Browse Category: Empowerment

Lessons in Success: Don’t Attempt to Do It All

I really dislike housework. From the time I was in my early 20s and out on my own I have paid other people to do my housecleaning.

There was actually a time when I made barely more hourly than I was paying my housekeeper.  And yet I never saw it as a luxury. It was a necessity to me.

So when faced with the option of spending 6 to 8 hours every weekend playing the happy homemaker or paying someone to do something they take pride and pleasure in — knowing they’re going to complete it in less than half the time it takes me – it became a no-brainer.

And here’s where a lot of entrepreneurs and startup business people make a vital error: they attempt to do it all. They are the IT department, scheduler, housekeeper, bookkeeper, as well as putting effort into doing the work that is their business. They  erroneously believe that they can’t afford to bring on help.

Again I go back to the fact that if it’s not your primary skill set, you’re going to take much longer at it and utilize and expend much more energy doing it.

Think about what you’re doing in your business. Are you doing what makes you money? Is that where the majority of your effort and energy is spent?

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How to Use the Language of Intention

thoughtsWhen working on Manifesting, Intentions, and Law of Attraction, it’s imperative that you understand how powerful language is.

Clarity is so important when dealing with The Universe, your creative consciousness, prayer, or that cosmic Sears Roebuck catalog that fuels the outcome of your intentions.

Here are ways for you to use the Language of Intention:

Eliminate words such as trying, hoping, wanting, to be, will, going to, etc…  All of these words create a space that says, “Not Now,” or “At some obscure time in the future.” It says this is not important and it doesn’t matter when it happens. Instead, focus on words that are present tense: I am, I can, I have, I do. Much more powerful language creates much more powerful outcomes.

Eliminate negative placeholders. These are words such as not, don’t, won’t, can’t, shouldn’t, etc… “Not” is not recognized. So if you say “I don’t want to be alone,” what you’re really telling the universe is “I don’t want to be alone.”  See what I mean by it being a negative placeholder? The more powerful language you can use is to tell us what you do want.

Don’t name illness or limitation. Again, we see things in the perfection that we desire. My standard is: I am happy, healthy and whole.

State things in a positive manner. Instead of saying “I intend that I’m not afraid anymore,” we would say “I intend that I am courageous.” Positive thoughts bring positive experiences; negative thoughts bring negative experiences.

So the next time you’re faced with a life challenge and want to make a change, remember your thoughts, remember your words.

What is the most recent good thing you’ve attracted to your life? It can be as simple as a good parking spot, or as big as a new career.

Share your successes in the comments.

3 Tips for Keeping Your Life Balanced

mind, body, spirit, soul and youBalance is not something that’s been a destination for me; it’s more of a journey. But there are some things that I do consistently and they really help me find that place that I call balance in my life.

In reading the following tips, you may think – gasp – I couldn’t possibly do those things. I’d be selfish to even think I could.

Truthfully, I’ve never felt selfish for taking these steps. And in that rear-view mirror vision we call hindsight, I know in my heart of hearts that doing these things allows me to step out for others in ways I couldn’t possibly have if I hadn’t done them. It’s in doing these things that I have the energy, drive, and desire to be there for other people.

1. Remember how important you are. You are the most important person in your life. It’s important to understand this. You don’t need to sacrifice your comfort, safety, values, or any other damn thing to “make someone else happy.” They’re responsible for their own outcomes.

2. Learn to say no. No is a whole and complete sentence. You do not need to justify, explain, validate, or negotiate this position. Look at it this way: you’re not saying no to other people, you’re learning to say yes to yourself.

3. Communicate your needs appropriately. Do not expect others to guess what you want. They can’t read your mind. Do not beat around the bush; in fact, assuming or just hoping they will come to understand what it is you need, will only leave you and them frustrated and unsatisfied. Ask for what you need. Just remember they should be the most important person in their life and no is a whole and complete sentence for them too.

What tips do you have for keeping life balanced?

Share your best ideas with us in the comments.

Lessons in Success: Make Decisions

Successful people make lots of decisions. They get comfortable making decisions. They don’t wait for life to happen to them; they take charge.They make change.

If you’re not comfortable making decisions, you have to step outside of that to find success. And sometimes that first decision is the hardest. Successful people also make those decisions quickly. They know that very little is irretrievable.

ArcheryThey live by the philosophy of:

    • Ready
    • Fire
    • Aim

Which translates to: first plan, then launch, and then evaluate, in that order. Decisions are made each time.

Where many others get caught up is in the ready (they wait for everything to be perfect) – aim (they keep looking for the right set of circumstances, afraid to make the decision to launch; essentially moving the target repeatedly) – fire (many often never actually pull the trigger, waiting for the first two circumstances to magically provide them with a predetermined outcome).

So even if you’re just deciding today to make these changes, it’s a decision. Congratulate yourself. You’re on your way.

What’s the best decision you ever made?

Share your success stories with us in the comments.

11 Ways to Embrace Joy in Your Life

I really believe that happiness is an external process based on the attributes or attainment of a specific item or event.

“I’ll be happy when I have a family.”Smiles
“I’ll be happy when I meet Mr. Right.”
“I’ll be happy when I lose 20 pounds.”

I’ll be happy when… if… once…

These are all contingent upon something outside of you. But true joy comes from the peace of understanding that it is simply a choice.  Here are some of the ways you can choose to be joyful on a daily basis.

  1. Don’t require anyone’s permission to act. I understand this is my life and I own every decision I make.
  2. Don’t make excuses. In owning my decisions, I also own the consequences – good, bad or indifferent.
  3. Seek out discomfort. If I’m comfortable, then I’m already doing it. All growth/expansion/advancement lies in the area just outside our comfort zone.
  4. Don’t let fear stop you. Fear may cause me to hesitate, regroup and rethink; yet I understand some of my greatest success and joy has been strategically wrapped up in my greatest fears.
  5. Say YES because it’s powerful. Have you ever had an opportunity present that was so good you simply shouldn’t say no – and yet you did – for lack of resources (time, money, experience, etc.)? Most times the act of saying YES frees up the resources you needed in the first place. Understand the world is filled with infinite resources. Sometimes you just have to do the footwork to find them.
  6. Never settle. I truly believe that I deserve the best that life has to offer, that people have to give, and that I can share with others.
  7. Love yourself more than anyone else. Until I began doing this wholeheartedly I had no idea how much I was missing out on and how it was truly shortchanging the people around me. While it sounds counterproductive, putting you first provides you with more resources to give to others.
  8. Keep learning. Every experience, program, class, book, relationship and/or thought you have helps you to add tools to that toolbox you carry with you through life.
  9. Be flexible. If Plan A didn’t work, relax – there are 25 more letters in the alphabet.
  10. Refuse to quit. If you’ve ever watched a toddler learn to walk it really is a testament to the sheer will and determination of the human race. Those little tiny people with practically no muscle tone, zero coordination and a head that is by weight and volume 1/3 of their entire body – Just – Keep – Trying! They refuse to let those first two or three thousand stumbles, falls, trips or face plants slow them down.
  11. Avoid comparisons. In yoga we’re taught not to compare our experience with others or even with our own from a previous moment. By avoiding comparison the opinions of others carry no weight. By avoiding comparison you silence the inner critic.

What do you do to choose joy in your life?